sometime last year

in my dark room,

I lay next to you,

burrow my face in your neck

And sometimes I wondered if you noticed me

or if you knew I was next to you

I could never tell

your movements,

your gaze

I could never tell

I felt your steady movements,

your slow breath

There is thunder in our hearts,

rain in our words

You held me

but I don’t think

that you really felt me

There was an in-between,

an entity that I always felt.

It’s still here even if you aren’t

My skin sheds everyday

and I notice

you will never hold my hand,

you will never feel this skin