I’m such a clumsy person. It was seventh period, child guidance. At the time it was still in the early stages of development, which translates: it was free time because we didn’t have the necessary preparations ready. The class actually took place in a computer lab, so it wasn’t like we were completely left with nothing to do.

Immediately I jump on a computer and pull up The Wrangler Online to edit some of my works. Idly scrolling through drafted works, and in the background I play YouTube music. The earphones aren’t my own, I’m borrowing my dad’s. Now, before when my Dad ignores me- sorry I meant “he can’t hear me”, he says it’s because of the earbuds. I’ve never believed him, I’m use to my family telling me to shut up.

I take back all that distrust now.

Putting in the earbuds, even without music, I feel separated from the world. Everything is slightly muted, almost like how it sounds when there’s water in your ears. You can still hear, but everything sounds at a distance.

Quickly I fill the desolate feeling with music, plugging it in to the main console, I hear k pop music. Korean Pop, this particular song was “Loser” by Big Bang. It had a mixture of Korean and English, and even I, who isn’t a real fan of rap, found myself enjoying those parts as well. I hummed along when it was Korean, and got a bit giddy when they sang in English. The music wasn’t that loud so I turned it up more.

That’s when I should have noticed.

The earphones, as well as they kept things out, they excelled at amplifying the music directly into the ear. Usually I listened to music with only four notches up. Never had I needed to turn it above that.

After a few more songs I briefly take out one earphone. That’s strange, why is the music louder now when I take one out? I take the other one out- and the music plays even louder. I have no earphones in. I had plugged the earphones into the wrong slot. It was not the main console but the monitor that hooked up the audio. Everyone had heard blaring, Korean music. Yet, no one did a thing.

I was very flustered. My face was taking on a startling red and I could begin to feel my neck grow hot underneath the collar. I apologized profusely. I know how it annoyed a majority of my friends when I played the music aloud and not to myself- but they weren’t mad.

“Oh, I thought you knew” my classmates said. They shrugged away my apologies and went on with their worlds. There was no judgment. They had just accepted it. One girl even asked for the song title. As mortified as I am, I’m also thankful. Being yourself, you’ll be accepted more than you think.