I’ll admit it. I love myself. Narcissistic or not, it’s healthy and totally necessary to love yourself. It’s obviously something that takes a while to do, especially when you’re born into a society that teaches you to believe you’re the worst version of yourself, but I’ve made milestones since I began my journey to self-love. I’m much happier, I’m more positive, and I’m not as horrible to myself as I used to be. I’m also here to help any of you that might be struggling to love yourself.

It definitely won’t be easy, and you won’t be in this little bubble of giggles and gumdrops. It’s a process that you have to begin and undergo. Think of it as a project on you, for you. You have to put yourself first sometimes, and that can be hard if you’re used to always trying to please others or prone to saying “yes” when you know aren’t able to live up to that one word. And I can say from experience that these methods will in fact keep you in that despondent funk you are desperately trying to avoid. And maybe it’s because you want to distract yourself from any problems in your life. Either way there’s a lot of psychology to it that I’m just not going to get into.

Anyway, you’re not going to get anywhere if you’re doing things that don’t make you happy. As Parks and Recreation once said, “treat yo’ self.” Sleep in, put on some fuzzy socks, have a good cry ― whatever will purge you of the bad attitude you have toward yourself.

It may sound a little silly, but make a monthly list of all the great things you’ve done, however big or small, it’s still an accomplishment and it will do wonders for your ego. Take selfies when your look is #onfleek. You know, baby steps. And maybe do some things that are good for your physical body as well, like exercising – yoga is known to have many benefits, you won’t only be fit, but you’ll feel (and look!) so ridiculously amazing after each session. And I personally love maintaining a skincare routine. It really leaves me cool, calm, and collected and helps keep my skin healthy, which is always a plus. Well you get the gist, pamper yourself to your heart’s content ― it’ll make up for the times you’ve neglected your well being.

On the other hand, it can be difficult to break through the negativity surrounding our society no matter how hard you try. The era we live in romanticizes these mental diseases that some shouldn’t categorize themselves in. It’s not “cool” or “trendy” to try out something that people actually struggle with daily and you’re not gaining anything from it. But on another note, it’s easy to bully yourself and it’s the hardest habit to quit. Think of it this way, if you saw someone bullying a good friend of yours, putting them down or calling them names, you would obviously want to intervene and comfort your friend right? Well same thing, but you’re the one in both positions. Don’t be so hard on yourself. Do something to empower and liberate yourself, like listening to Queen or swiping on your boldest lipstick color. Get out in the world and do something that excites you.

And as Bobby McFerrin once put it, “Don’t worry, be happy.”